Monday, September 26, 2011

Chapter 2, Love Already Waning?

Let us begin Chapter 2. I really enjoyed digging in to the word and finding so many examples of God's love and his commands for married couples. He has so much planned for us if we can stick together and rely on Him!


God Bless!
-Linda

5 comments:

Alison said...

I have to say that this was a convicting chapter. First, pg 25 and 26 convicted me of times that I have lied. Even "small lies" are sin and viewed as just as offensive as murder, in God's eyes. Sin is Sin. Too often I would justify my actions, hoping to save some small embarrassment or to keep my pride from being hurt. But God desires us to be holy, as He is holy, including speaking the truth at all times.

Page 30 and 31 reminded me of our last reintegration time after deployment. It was tough. And I had to realize that I had my thinking all wrong. It was too easy to think that my husband "left me" on purpose, and didn't care about the struggles I faced. But it simply wasn't the truth. Instead, I needed to turn my thoughts toward God and focus on truth and reality. Deployments are part of our husband's job, and they come at the time when God has ordained them for our lives. It may seem odd, but it is God's plan for our family, and for our faith to grow through this particular "moment" in time.

So, focusing on the wrong things, brings bitterness. The book said it well on pg 30 "Our needs can quickly turn to selfishness and pride that allows sin to seep into our marriage and cause dissonance." Also, this statement was convicting on pg 31, "When we allow bitterness in our lives we are in a sense pointing a finger of blame at God for not giving us what we desire."

What are our desires? A perfect husband? A life free of difficulties? A marriage we don't have to work hard at? If we don't see these desires fulfilled, will we become bitter?

We need to be quick to forgive, quick to love, give lots of patience and compassion.

There are many other great things in the chapter, but I can't mention them all. Thanks for the good study! It has been encouraging!

Karen said...

Like Alison said "sin is sin" and I can remember times when I told "white lies" because either I didn't want to hurt someone's feelings, or I was asked a favor that I knew I didn't want to do so instead of expressing my feelings I lied because it made things easier. Well in fact it doesn't, it complicates things and once you start you make up even more excuses for the behavior when in fact their aren't any. I think for me it was lack of confidence and worrying more about upsetting others. For me as I have aged that has changed quite a bit. I have no problem speaking up and being honest. And honestly it is a good feeling when you can find the courage to speak up and be truthful not only with yourself but with others.

I like Psalm 27:14 where is says, " wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say on the Lord. Again, it takes a lot of courage and strength to be married to a military member. Since I moved here 9 months ago I have met 2 ladies that will be going through a divorce. My husband said to me that he was surprised that I haven't left. My reply, I accept that he is gone often (in the last 2 years he has only been home for 6 months)but to be honest I do get angry, frustrated and even jealous. You ask why jealousy? Well, I think for me I feel like he has left the family, his responsibilities and he only has to look out for himself. I have heard military members say sometimes it is much easier to deploy than to stay home and be a family man with added responsiblities. Well we as women wear many hats and often out of frustration I would think where is my "break." I realize that I am being selfish and only thinking of myself. It is his job, it is his mission, and because of him I can put my son to bed at night knowing that he is fighting to keep our country, our children, our friends, and loved ones safe. How can I be angry at him. So after reading chapter 2 it provoked a lot of thought and I realize that as a human I still have many things to work on. But for right now my challenge is to continue to be a good a wife. One that motivates, encourages, prays, and loves even in the most difficult of times.

Dena said...

As for this chapter, scripture reminded me how becoming bitter towards something can cause you to loose some blessings from God, just as Michel did in the book of Samuel. My husband has been in the army for 5 1/2 yrs now and in that time, he has lived with us for 2 yrs and spent 3 1/2 years in Iraq, Afghanistan, and training, all of which we couldn't live together. I can honestly say that there were times that I would become bitter towards him, thinking that he preferred this bachelor life rather than being home. That caused some strain in our marriage during our first reintegration after his year plus training and combined 15 mo tour to Iraq.

It is hard to reintegrate with your husband after a long time apart, just as David and Michel went through in Samuel. For myself, I found the transitional stage of reintegrating after this last deployment to be better after getting rid of the bitterness I had in my heart on the first deployment. It is true that sin can hold you back from experiencing many blessings that God has for you. After the first deployment, our marriage hit the bumpiest part and was very hard for awhile, yet this time, I can say, that our marriage is now the strongest it has been in the 11 years.

It is hard, but it is significant that we open ourselves to allow God to expose our sin to us and get rid of it. As military wives, I'm sure we can all relate to the frustrations of being lonely and exhausted when our husbands are gone. Yet it is crucial that we are in the word and continue praying so that our minds and hearts remain holy. I need this reminder especially in the exhausting days when I feel as though I "don't have time" for anything more than what is set before me. Yet I know that when I"m not in God's word or consistently praying, sin will creep into my thoughts and I deal with things like bitterness again.

We need support from Godly friends to keep us on track!

Mabel Corcuera said...

While reading chapter 2, makes me realize( The Diary part) how grateful and blessed am I that I already know God before I met my husband who is in the military. Without Him I can't be able to endure deployments and all sorts of trials while my husband serve the country.
I agree Dena that we need Godly friends to keep us on track. My sister in Christ is the one encouraging me in times of troubles and downfall. And i know that someone is praying for our family.
I met some people while in the military struggles everyday in dealing with their husband because of the bitterness in their hearts. The result of all the bitterness is sin.(big or small it is still SIN).And I want to quote the sentence that encourage me: Let's look at the bitterness that can build up in a marriage relationship if we aren't careful in guarding our hearts.

Linda Faith said...

What a great chapter! I have to admit at first I was dreading all the "homework" and having to look up so many verses. I have found that as I've been working on this study I'm becoming more familiar with the Bible and it makes me feel more confident, not overwhelmed.

I've never been a good liar...but I have stretched the truth from time to time or left out information, which is basically the same thing. Something I will be watching out for in the future, for sure.

I really enjoyed pages 27-30. I feel it's like a personalized deployment help guide. Now I have a list of verses for Peace, Comfort and Hope. Also listing ways to communicate with my hubby while he's away and ways to conquer temptation and ways to make reintegration run smoothe. I am sure I will refer back to these pages when he's away!!

I can certainly see the importance of honesty and integrity everyday and in the stories we read in the Bible. We must work at keeping ourselves on the narrow path. It's easy to get lazy or feel like "I have this figured out. Everything is just fine. I don't HAVE to read the Bible tonight, or pray. etc..." Those are dangerous thoughts because it cracks open the door for Satan to use his sly tricks to deceive and trap us. So, when things are good I have to make an effort to not be lazy in my walk with God.

Great stuff! I'm lovin it!